Indian Name

I have been reading this book, that so far I do not recommend because it is a bit over the top, called A Thousand White Women. The one thing that I have found funny about it is that while all these white ladies are supposed to be marrying these savage Indian men as some sort of peace treaty in the 1870's, they all somehow get names as they exist among the people. It struck me funny when one woman was upset because she is clumsy and they call her "Falls Down Woman."

I told this to Dear Sir (who I am thinking about renaming 'the professor' since he studies constantly and ignores me thoroughly) and told him that I would be called "Little Stupid Woman" and he would be "Smart Man who Slobbers" or "Can't Use Tools." He whipped out a doozie and I have been laughing ever since. He said they would call me "Cuts Own Hand." I am literally still laughing.

What is your Indian name? I would love to hear it.


Anonymous said...

so, I'm going with the one you gave me because that's pretty much how I roll. My second choice would be
"woman who screws up a lot"

thanks for the laugh, I needed it

Anonymous said...

heres another one

"consecutive farting woman"

R said...


You make me laugh. Gee whiz, I knew you would have a field day with it. When you think of more, let me know!!!

Emma Sometimes said...

She Who Caffeinates

Runs With Rugrats

Waits By Coffeemaker

Drive With Fire

Hummus Eater

She Who Drinks Latte

R said...

Doozie---how about "Farts Consecutively"?

Emma--Drive With Fire? LOL

Doozie---how about Fire Butt?

Emma---What is Drive With Fire?

Doozie---How about Butt Explodes?

Emma---Oh I get it---you drive fast. How about Drives Fast

Wait, it has to sound more primitive like Drives With Fire or Operates Big Metal Horse or No, Rides Metal Horse With Fire

I am laughing too hard. This is ridiculous. I can't operate under these conditions. Indians are funny. Does that make me a bigot? Gee I hope not.

Natalie said...

I like Owns Big Pig. Yah.

Groovy Mom said...

LOL! Cuts own hand would work for me too, but I'll let you have it. I've decided to own "Thong Sticks Out" and wear it proudly. ;-)

Emma Sometimes said...

Chief Thong Chafing

She Who Sports Floss

Running Hairy Pits

Rocks To Little Pod

Natalie cracks me up.

Anonymous said...

mine is a sort of derivative of doozies first one;

'man who screws not a lot'

Dapoppins said...

Been thinking of this all day...

But Emma's are so great...

Sleeps Alot Woman

Moves Slowly Talks Loudly

Tiny Bladder

Rolls Hair In Car Window

Mrs. Sinta said...

Cuts Own Finger

Laughs Like Bull Moose

Waddles While Walking

Spits At Geese

Eats All The Chocolate

and my personal favorite,

Belches Like A Man

Emma Sometimes said...

I'm making a Happy Birthday card on my blog. Come and leave a note!

She Who Skims To Make Comment

R said...

Natalie---Glad you like it!!! LOL

Groovy Mom---I thought you would get a laugh out of that considering you don't typically work that way---wearing thongs and their sticking out, that is.

Emma---I love 'Rocks to Little Pod' sounds primitive. LOL

Ponder---sorry man. How about Man Who Scales Walls?

Dapoppins---I like Rolls Hair in Car Window. But I like Rolls Hair in Steel Horse Window better. Just makes for a really long name. I have a tiny bladder too. I need Detrol or something, man. How about just Pees A lot?

Mrs. Sinta-- I like Eats All the Chocolate. That had me laughing for a spell.

Emma---thanks for the heads up!!!
She Who Obeys

Anonymous said...

Only problem with the name you have given me? I don't use the microwave to cook with either! LOL

Let's see...

Shuffling Porcupine fits. ;o)

Muley said...


Drools While Snoring

Chief Big Bean Wind

Runs With Squirrels

Forked Tongued Turkey

R said...

Lisa---No mic? No way...

Muley--I like name #2 even though I hate Big Bean Winds. Please no.

Anonymous said...

We have a microwave. It's used for making popcorn. ;o)

Aunt Jo said...

I would be "She Who Forgets" according to my husband.

According to my husbands late PePaw, I was "Sexy Suzy". I 'bout fell out when he called me that. That statement was followed shortly by a swift box to the ears by Memaw.

R said...

Aunt Jo---That's me too!! Drives my man nuts.

How funny about PePaw. Sometimes old men can be shocking. Good that Memaw had him under strict discipline!! Ha ha!!