After making dinner for the kids, I headed out the door yesterday to get to work. I was sort of in a hurry because I even went without eating or drinking so much as a protein shake. The vitamin water I threw in my bag leaked all over and once in the car I had to grab the reserve of napkins in the glove compartment and wipe up the seat and the bottom of my bag. Even my name tag got wet.
Then when I went to make my right turn I hit someone from behind. Barely, actually. He was going about two miles an hour and since it was raining (I think) my foot slipped on the break and then I bumped him. We got out of our cars and he stared at me---just approached me as I got out. He was a gnarly old man. "What were you trying to do?" he asked.
"What? What do you mean?" I asked, squinting.
"What were you trying to do?" I almost told him that my foot slipped but he would not have cared. I got out of the car.
"Are you ok?"
"Yeah, I'm fine."
"Your car looks fine."
"Yeah, it's fine."
"So does mine."
"Yeah." He got in his car and took off.
Once at work I was relating the story to someone: "When I bumped him, I said 'crap!'" I realized that I was talking to a person that cusses. A lot. I forgot about that. I was thinking of how the bad stuff comes out of me when bad things happen. I was tipped a little and here I was, not thanking God that everything was fine and I was ok, I was shouting crap at the top of my lungs and putting my car into park.
"You mean you didn't say something with an 'sh' before it?"
"Uh, no," I said, realizing now I was pinned. Lack of dinner will do that to me.
"You don't cuss, do you?"
"No, I don't," I said.
"I say cuss words in front of you all the time! I have such a terrible mouth!"
"I don't expect you to be like me," I said.
The pastor at our church just preached a sermon about we as Christians being incognito all the time. I feel I am that way at work sometimes. I am usually pretty bold about some things, but this work setting is a little different. I am working with homosexuals, Muslims, and many people that do not care for children. And even though I do not agree with these people, I like them, and I think they are very pleasant. It is funny how God uses the loss of dinner for me to slip up. If I were to be tortured by my enemies because of a want of information, all they would have to do is starve me.
It's either lack of dinner or lack of brains. Most likely both.
Green Cathedral
Madness in a high-ceilinged building.
Followers
People in my Holy Place
The Professor----Formerly known as Dear Sir, my husband, the man of the house
The Oldest----Known in younger years as Mickey Mouse, and now he is embracing adulthood by being over 18.
Eraser Eater----Well-known for his old habit of eating erasers and whining about ridiculous things. Now he eats Tabasco sauce and says little in his 15 years.
The Girl---The one who is still more mature than I am at 13.
The Oldest----Known in younger years as Mickey Mouse, and now he is embracing adulthood by being over 18.
Eraser Eater----Well-known for his old habit of eating erasers and whining about ridiculous things. Now he eats Tabasco sauce and says little in his 15 years.
The Girl---The one who is still more mature than I am at 13.
8 comments:
I don't remember the Scarecrow stopping for dinner on the way to Oz either.
I'm not entirely sure what I meant by that.
ps. the pics of cassi singing are up.
I say crap a lot. I used to be a non-swearer, most of the time. I guess most of the time I am, but I don't feel guilty when one slips, and sometimes I throw one in just for effect. I guess it's my way of making sure God has plenty to do, as far as I'm concerned. Aw heck, no worries, there. ;-)
I try extremely hard not to swear, but it's a struggle, especially when I hear it from students and professors alike all day every day. I don't think anyone will be condemned for saying "crap" or letting a big one slip every once in a while. People do eventually start to notice, though, if you are the only one with a clean mouth...even if it takes some a longer time than others : )
What a yucky day! Now you can be thankful you got all your yucky days out in one fail swoop. Maybe if you didn't have to look around your teetering mailbox, then it wouldn't have happened. :)
I say crap a lot too. It's funny though when you have kids all of a sudden you are self-conscious of what you say. I think it's funny you can tell a mom from a crowd when she announces she has to "go to the potty". What single person says they go to the potty?
I hate the question: What were you trying to do? It is a nasty old person trap to try to get you to incriminate yourself. There is not a good answer, so let's make something up.
1. I wanted to run my car over the top of yours, but I did not get up enough speed.
2. I have no brakes, but I proved that I can do just as well by dragging my feet.
3. I am an evangelical, and now that I have your attention, I want to invite you to a seeker service. Just be careful in the church parking lot.
4. I was trying to get to the grocery store in just 62 seconds, but you got in my way.
5. I was hoping to be late to work, wreck my car, and make your rates go up. One out of three is not bad.
I used to say A LOT of things. I went from saying very BAD words to euphemisms. Now I just don't say anything at all. Believe me though; my tongue has a way of slipping up. We just fix it and get back on the path.
I didn't know you were "working outside the home." :)
Uncle Joe---For some reason that made me laugh.
Groovy---I accidentally slipped just yesterday! I slammed my fingers in the sliding glass door and almost wept. I had to bounce around to keep myself from crying.
Lyssa---that would be hard. I hear it a lot at work, so I hear it more often. Kind of like when you watch a lot of R rated movies or something---it doesn't seem so bad after awhile.
Bee---Don't even get me going on the teetering mailbox. Gee whiz. STILL NOT DONE. I have resolved that I am going to buy my own mailbox, put it in myself and then send them the bill. I don't say "go to the potty!" Ha ha.
SINTA--I had a good laugh at this. You are so stinking funny!
Anne---I didn't know I was working outside the home either! LOL No, I decided to to save some money for some major dental work I need done. I have great teeth, but some teeth that need some help in the back, so I have to get some re constructive stuff done and thought I would help out. It has been good to get out a little although the Prof. wants me to quit ALL the TIME. He drives me nuts. Everytime I work he says, "quit, ok?"
I curse as you well know but you love me anyways.
God loves me anyways too.
When that old guy asked you what you were trying to do you should have said "well I was trying to bump you so you'd get out of your car and then I could kill you and take all your money, haven't you seen that on dateline?"
Because HECK, most moms such as yourself are definetely TRYING to hit people with their cars because it is soooo like....stimulating????
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